Wednesday, April 29, 2009

A (Very) Brief Rant.

Today I read in the paper that the mayor of Richmond is refusing to put the name of the olympic speed skating oval in both French and English. Apparently it's a municipal building. I say not true; this building is going to be the focus of people across the world, and should therefore fairly represent Canada, not just Richmond. Canada has two official languages, and the second is French. Use it.

And now, if you're interested in something a little more positive, read Sandy's post below. She's excited :P

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

excitement + PSA sandy style.

ok, now that the excitement is over, i'll explain. 
for the past couple of months i've been waiting for a corset i got custom made. i had to get it custom because i have a long torso and i wanted it higher so i'd be like boobs, but not BOOBS! ya know?
anyway, i finally have it. it's black satin and dear god i love it. 

as for other points of interest i went to belly dancing. 
ok, pause. 
a think about the swine flu just came on tv and i'm a little scared. pandemics get me, more so since i've started taking public transit. i was on skytrain this morning and someone coughed and like i freaked a bit. like by coughed i mean HACKED. 

so heres my announcement for the day: 
if you are sick, stay home. 
just don't get me sick. stay. home.

Monday, April 27, 2009

A Knitting Update

Today my aunt—who is essentially responsible for getting me on the knitting train, although it was a friend of mine who got me kick-started—dropped by for a cup of tea. We got to talking about knitting, and it took up about half of our discussion, so now my head is aswirl with needles and yarn and all kinds of wonderful textile project possibilities. I thought I might share a few here.

The project I'm currently working on is a cardigan from a book called Hip To Knit. It's supposed to be a book for beginners with a few easy projects that progress through the basics from scarves to hats to mittens to sweaters. My aunt (yes, the same one mentioned above) handed off some orange/brown/yellow yarn to me (which is why I call it my candy corn cardigan), and I thought it would suit the pattern. Unfortunately the gauge is doing all kinds of weird things, so I'm basically just having to ignore any and all stitch counts they give me and just knit according to the measurements in the back. Regardless of whether the stitch count is right, I think it'll turn out well, as long as I can make it the right size.

After that I'll be starting a vest. A while ago I bought some lovely green yarn, very slightly variegated, from one of the yarn stores in Vancouver. I've had my eye on this pattern for a while (it's the scoop neck vest by blue sky alpaca if anyone's wondering), and I thought this would be lovely. Plus, I have very little green in my wardrobe, so I thought this would add a little much-needed variety.

After that I have another cardigan sort of thing lined up. It' a bit of a cropped jacket with a Wonderful high collar. I found this absolutely incredible multicoloured yarn at a fibre festival out in Abbotsford a few weeks ago, and it'll suit the pattern wonderfully (it's the 28thirty jacket by Sarah & Rachel). I think I'll do it with half or 3/4 sleeves, just because I'll save a little yarn that way.

Anyway, that's it for now! Happy knitting ^_^

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Things are changing... I think.

This is going to be a brief one, because I don't think there's that much that I really want to put out there. But there are still a few thoughts running through my head that I'd like to share.

The first is that we are all getting older, and that it's remarkable how much our roles in the game of life change as we age. A few of my friends are in faster programs than my own (including our dear Sandy), and they'll have to get real jobs (i.e. careers) and start living adult lives soon, possibly in the next few months. Given that I still have yet to a) have a real job and b) move out of my parents house, and c) am going to be in university for about the next 6 years at the very least, this is a staggering thought to me. I mean, I've been a kid with very few real responsibilities for my entire life. Soon I'll have to start thinking in a completely different mindset about how I live my life. It's a little scary, really...

The second is that, as we age and change, we grow apart from the people we ally ourselves with. It's hard to stop it, and we feel differently about each of these changing relationships, but they are changing regardless. I'm not really sure what to do about it: do I maintain the ties I have to people who I really have nothing in common with anymore, and how can I mold the ones who I do still have ties with into the new relationships that may be forming?

In short, life is complicated. True story.

nightly thoughts.

you know how you always saw the girls in archie comics talking about how their nose is shiny?
i never got that until like right now. it's like theres a flat bridge coming off my nose. like a ski jump. 
i read somewhere that to promote healthy body image one should stare at themselves in the mirror and watch the flaws just disappear. the part of that i question is in real life, how many people are going to just stare at you that long. really after a couple vigorous minutes of this excersize the only thing i've looked at is my eyes. and chin. 
i never used to think anything was wrong with my chin until a girl in my  class pointed out that it was connected to my neck in a manner that gave me no real silhouette. 
i hate her for saying that. 
since then all i've looked at is my chin. i used to love my neck, i thought it was long and beautiful, now i see it as the enemy. after many more events i've come to see her as the enemy too. like who points out stuff like that? 
who DOES that?
anyway, i don't really know the point of this, i think it's the pinot noir. but i've been feeling really prone to hiding lately. i was staring at myself in the mirror on the car ride home today, and just thought, wow. i'm really here. this is really now, and i'm really not who i thought i would be when i was 6. it was startling and sad and everything. 

Thursday, April 23, 2009

First Blog!!

So, this being my very first blog on this most aweome blog site, I would like to introduce myself! My name is Jennifer, but I prefer Jen (people call me Jennifer when they're either angry or flabbergasted at me). I'm 18 and am currently a student at Simon Fraser Univers-i-tee (sorry, Terry the light tech's accent is getting to me ahaha). As of now, I'm focusing my area of study on Communicatons and Psychology. I would like to thank Sandy and roses_are_red for allowing me to contribute to this blog. Love ya gals! <3

Stemming from the University-talk segway, I feel very relieved and unburdened because I wrote my last exam of the semester....which means that I've pretty much completed my first year of university...woah. I do have to say after these past 2 semesters of university education and all of grade school, the consequences of exam and academic preparation are becoming more and more explicit. I use the fancy term that is semi-fabricated of anti-relational interdepence (as seen on my Twitter). It's basically a flexible wall put between you and important people in your lives when other priorities exist. I say it's flexible because you do have some control over the matter. But sometimes, the fact that we have control just isn't enough. Pressure it parental, academic, peer, or just having-a-good-life-when-you-"grow-up" (yeah, I definitely will be grown up after all my education is done with). This comes from a personal experience a few days ago, where, because of studying, I chose not to visit my Grandma in the hospital after a fall because I reasoned that I visted her the day before. Ipso facto, I missed a visit from my Uncle, Aunt, and cousin who I rarely see. Now, I'm not the one to use external attributions, but still....the situation was 90% out of my hands. So, do academic pursuits severely weaken one's social bonds? Do they screw up our priorities? How much control do we really have over situations like above?

Just had to make that little spiel now that a little vacation of mine is starting, free of academia!! =) =) What better way to start it than to have a Twilight party with some of my favourite people!! Let the swooning, bonding, and Edward vs. Jacob war begin!!!!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

lessons from my brothers relationship fail.

1) do not sleep w/ a guy on the first date especcially if it's your first. it will not end well and you will want to cling to him forever simply because of that fact
2) if your on psychiatric meds, take them. the instructions are on the bottle. how do you mess that up?
3) don't move in together in the first week. too much time together is just as bad as too much time apart. 
4) the bulk of your relationships together time should not be spent on an interactive internest computer game, no matter how much fun you think your having. just because your sitting beside each other doesn't mean that your spending time together

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Exams... blegh.

Sunshine is great; but really, it makes difficult things harder to deal with.

Today is my last exam. Unfortunately I'm having a very difficult time concentrating on getting through the exam itself rather than the fact that I'm almost out, so close to the end I can almost touch it. There are so many other things whizzing through my skull (Scotland, Twilight, knitting projects, and bunnies, to name a few) that it's hard to think of Canadian history as my first priority. I wish my head had a rewind-and-pause button so I could go back to the time when I was worried about one thing and one thing only: my history exam. Perhaps then I wouldn't feel quite so simultaneously calm and terrified...

The lesson to be learned here: my mind is a strange, strange place.

Enjoy the sunshine, everybody! :D

Monday, April 20, 2009

Creative Copying

How do you prove that your ideas are originally yours? They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flatter, personally I think it's the sincerest form of get your own fucking idea and don't pretend like you created something. 

The thing is, you can't really call credit. If you say anything then you look like a total bitch, and if you don't then you just feel like crap because someone else ripped off your idea and your mind. you feel cheap and used, and it's not the best feeling. 

right now i'm feeling pretty gross.

this may be considered a jane eyre spoiler.

I just finished Jane Eyre. It was wayy better than i thought it would be, but the end bugged me. 
If you haven't read the book, heres a brief overview: Jane grows up in a gross aunts family, Jane goes to boarding school, Jane falls in love, Jane leaves the guy, Jane goes back to him.
Something about the book didn't sit right with me, I think it's that she goes back to him. He hurt her, he showed her love but he was so dishonest with her. What in her right mind would make Jane not only think about him in her long absence, but then go back and marry the stormy petrel of a man. 

I guess it has to do with familiarity. Even if it doesn't feel right at the moment, it did at some time and maybe we just want that right to last forever. the problem is that nothing really stays right forever. things change, and it may be a different kind of right, but it won't be that pure strong right that we had before it got messed by people, by whatever. the worst of it is when you can pinpoint what screwed up the right. All that preoccupies your mind is what would happen if i hadn't done that? what if this had happened? would it have changed?

Think about it, if Jane hadn't run away and been Mr. Rochesters little mistress, would she have been happy? would he ever had married her once he everything he wanted and no commitment, no mystery, no hope? 
or if she had stayed in the little town and not gone back to him? would she have married st. john? would she have gone to india? would she have just stayed there and wasted away?
what if mr. rochester had stopped liking her in that time? what would she have done to get that love back to the way it was? what if she could just stay in a painful friendship waiting and waiting with no hope anything more would come, and all that she would feel is pain?
what if she tried, what if she tried for SO long but couldn't swallow the love and so all she did was hurt? 
what if mr. rochester decided he had never loved her at all?

Sunday, April 19, 2009

What happens to guided writing after high school.

for those of you who don't know, i have a mild obsession with those facebook survey things. last night i did an amazing one that prompted me to write mini essays which i'm pretty sure were only read by annie. 
since i think i actually had some valid points in these, i'm going to answer them in more detailed ways here. 
this may or may not be because i've been really uninspired lately and have turned to guided writing. if i have something actually interesting going on in my head though, i'll do that. 

First Question: What would you do if you won the lottery?
First off, i'd have to know what type of lottery it is. If i won two bucks off of a scratch card I would probably jump up and down in sheer happiness, which is kind of sad because i mean, it's $2. but then, i've come to the conclusion that people think my major excitement over minor things is sad and childish but my view is simple: if you were to only get excited over something really big that happened then you'd have a really boring really crappy life. happiness and overreaction keep things interesting, keep the happiness and life in someone. 
However, if i did win the big one, i'd love to say i'd donate all the money to charity and make the world better or whatever, but the first thing I'd do is buy a plane ticket to ontario. I had a terrible thought the other day and it's been plaguing me ever since: January was probably the last time I'm ever going to see my Grandma. Such an amazing person, and I feel like I hardly know her or any of my dad's family. I don't even write to her, how hard is it to grab the phone, or whip up a letter? At the same time though, I don't think I can spend more than a week in Peterborough at a time because well, i'm considered pretty chill in my family, and when i'm considered chill lord knows what everyone else is like. Also, i mean.... now don't get me wrong, i love the country, and i think if i had a like farm or forest to explore or a place to roam around and get my feet wet in i could do it, but it's hard staying inside all the time. i need to be able to know a city well enough to roam around and have something to do.

When I was two months old I moved to Spain. One day my mother was walking with a friend when a gypsy came up to her and started talking. Despite being fluent in Italian, my mother couldn't and still cannot speak or understand much Spanish. The Gypsy never mentioned the word for money, but instead started waving her arms about, "oh look, she's doing a dance!" was all my mother could comprehend. After she left her friend turned to her and said, "you know she just put a curse on Sandra right?" 
I got told that story when I was 12 and ever since crepuscular thoughts have pondered what i might have been fated too.
one of the most common theories is that I have an innate sense of boredom. no matter how exciting or amazing my life gets i still feel like nothings happening, like i have no friends and i'm just a big mess that has no real benefits. Maybe it's more of a laziness or a lack of self satisfaction. who knows. 
Anyway, i think i've successfully proven what I figured out in high school, guided writing doesn't work because when writing earnestly one cannot possibly stay on a topic. 

Thursday, April 16, 2009

sunshine! ^_^

I don't know about the rest of you, but I, for one, am SO GLAD to see the sun.

Here in Vancouver it's basically been raining (or at least heavily overcast... and then there was the abnormally high amount of snow...) since, oh, say November of last year? Maybe even October. So needless to say, it's rather a relief to see a little sunshine and feel something other than frigidly cold.

Just wanted to wish everybody a Happy Springtime! :D